Sermon Nuggets Mon Dec 31 Handling Forgiveness
Gen 45:1 Then
Joseph could no longer control himself before all his attendants, and he
cried out, “Have everyone leave my presence!”So there was no one with Joseph
when he made himself known to his brothers. 2 And
he wept so loudly that the Egyptians heard him, and Pharaoh’s household
heard about it.
3 Joseph
said to his brothers, “I am Joseph! Is my father still living?” But his
brothers were not able to answer him, because they were terrified at his presence.
4 Then
Joseph said to his brothers, “Come close to me.” When they had done so, he
said, “I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! 5 And
now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling
me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. 6 For
two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five
years there will not be plowing and reaping. 7 But
God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save
your lives by a great deliverance.
8 “So
then, it was not you who sent me here, but God. He made me father to
Pharaoh, lord of his entire household and ruler of all Egypt. 9 Now
hurry back to my father and say to him, ‘This is what your son Joseph
says: God has made me lord of all Egypt. Come down to me; don’t delay. 10 You
shall live in the region of Goshen and be near me—you, your children and
grandchildren, your flocks and herds, and all you have. 11 I
will provide for you there, because five years of famine are still to
come. Otherwise you and your household and all who belong to you will become
destitute.’
Handling Forgiveness
As we enter into a new year my wish
for us all is to be able to forget the past hurts grudges, resentments, and sins.
This story of Joseph may help us all handle forgiveness better but I believe
cannot really happen without the Lord. I am not sure that those who experienced
traumatic experience can forget it. Those who have been victims have not come
to grief if they think forgiveness is denying real emotion.
This Christmas there were many
tears with families who laid to rest their little children killed in Newtown,
Connecticut by a madman. How about a young girl raped by a drunken relative, or
person who was mugged and beaten and is in the hospital.
More healing will have to take place and it
begins from within not on any outside circumstances.
You and I may not face such tragic heartache as the
murderous and senseless death of a family member and loved one. But most of us
know the hurt of innocent or evil offenses. Some may be physical or sexual
abuse, or incest; others may be the victims of cruel teasing by school
classmates. Most of us have been victims of lies or gossip. Some have been
cheated upon in different ways.
When we are
hurt we want to strike back. When someone wrongs us we want them to pay. When
we suffer at the hands of another physical, emotional, or mental offense, we
want the offenders to suffer also. We want justice for crimes. God speaks clearly
about offenses that need to be punished.
Laws teach us about retribution.
Joseph had
lots of reasons to be bitter and hold grudges against his brothers. But when
all the tests were over, He embraced them and wept over them and offered the
best of what he can provide. He forgave them. There was a new beginning for
that family- a new year.
Now when someone wants to be
forgiven the offended party has two options. One is to forgive and the other is
not. For the Christian the Bible teaches us the importance of forgiveness. We
have an option to either obey or disobey; to receive the healing and blessing and
help from God or seek to resolve it on our own. Does that sound hard?
I think the first step in
understanding the subject of forgiveness as a Christian is to concentrate on
God’s attitude toward us. We have been forgiven people. He forgave people we
would never think of forgiving. He brought reconciliation to evil people who
repented. He brought salvation to you for no good reason. None of us can match
the requirements we would need to do to be forgiven except to accept it as a
gift from the one whose love goes beyond our offenses. He paid the price to
make it right. Now there is no need to go beaten ourselves up and not forgiving
ourselves, not because we deserve it, but he took all our sin on the cross and
wiped it away. We may have consequences from an earthly point of view for our
actions, but before God we are deemed righteous. It is grace to understand
forgiveness from Gods’ perspective.
What is hard is also to realize
that people that have offended us in coming to Christ have also been forgiven
by him. Christ death not only took our sins, but the sins of the one whom we
resent, hate, or over whom we hold a grudge. If they have not come to the Lord
then they are to be pitied and prayed for.
Ultimately all sin needs to be
faced before our Holy God. It is either by high priest, Jesus Christ, or it is
by the death and separation from Him eternally. We need a mediator and it is
that same mediator, Christ, who stands with our offender as a brother or sister
in the Lord.
Freely you have received. Freely
give.
Start with confession to the Lord
and receive the freedom of forgiveness first for yourself. Believe by faith you
are free from all guilt and enjoy His grace.
For Joseph forgiveness came when he
saw the hand of God in his life and it gave him a different perspective. As a
slave he became a most respected leader in Egypt. It was grace that allowed him
to move beyond his offenders.
Pastor Dale
Sermon Nuggets Tues Jan 1 – Initiation Forgiveness
Gen 45: 4 Then
Joseph said to his brothers, “Come close to me.” When they had done so, he
said, “I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! 5 And
now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling
me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. 6 For
two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five
years there will not be plowing and reaping. 7 But
God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to
save your lives by a great deliverance.
8 “So then, it was not you who sent
me here, but God. He made me father to Pharaoh, lord of his entire
household and ruler of all Egypt. 9 Now
hurry back to my father and say to him, ‘This is what your son Joseph
says: God has made me lord of all Egypt. Come down to me; don’t delay. 10 You
shall live in the region of Goshen and be near me—you, your children and
grandchildren, your flocks and herds, and all you have. 11 I
will provide for you there, because five years of famine are still to
come. Otherwise you and your household and all who belong to you will become
destitute.’
Initiating Forgiveness
I think we can act in forgiveness before we
will feel forgiveness. That means we must extend our hand first. We must utter
the first word; we must make the call or write the note; we must make the first
move. There are so many broken relationships because people are sitting and
waiting for someone else to make the first move.
I
appreciate one of the deacons at my previous church in Trade Lake Baptist who
would tell people, “You are the mature Christian it is up to you to make the
first move to make things right.” I thought that was good advice.
The reason Joseph was able to face
his brothers and provide forgiveness is because he put them to a test. He saw
their genuine repentance, regretting their sin with regard to Joseph, and
reversing their actions when a similar situation was presented with regard to
Benjamin.
Joseph demonstrated his sincere and
total forgiveness of his brothers for the evil they had committed against him.
Forgiveness is a vital part of the Christian experience. It is necessary in
terms of our relationship with God: For if you forgive men for their transgressions,
your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then
your Father will not forgive your transgressions Mt 6:14-15
Since the school shooting in
Newtown people are remembering other previous tragedies. In 1998 two middle
schoolers dressed in camouflage and rang the fire alarm at Jonesboro, Ark.
While students and teachers filed out they began shooting.
Four students were killed and one
teacher Shannon Wright tried to protect her students and got in the way and was
shot and died. Because of a loophole in the law each of the shooters were
released free of charges on their 21st Birthdays.
Michael Wright the husband of the slain
teacher was a Christian. He knew that he must fight against being consumed by
rage. He began on the very Sunday after the horror, asking his church family
for support. The stakes, he realized, were high. First, there was his 3 year
old son, Zane.
"When my wife was dying, she
said, "I love you, and take care of Zane.' Well, if I lose it, then I can't
take care of him." And then there was the spiritual issue. "If you
let the hate and anger build in you, that's a very strong sin," he says
softly. "I need to be able to totally forgive. To me, forgiveness would be
that when these boys get out, I can see them on the street or in a Wal-Mart and
not want to . . " He voices trails off. He concedes, "I am not at
that point yet." At least he knows unresolved anger leads to bitterness,
hostility, and revenge. Forgiveness leads to freedom and reconciliation
Now Joseph had a good deal of time
to think about this. He had time to work out some of his feelings. When it
comes to anger and arguing the instructions of Ephesians is do not let the sun
go down on your anger. Work it out before bitterness creeps in. But it seemed
almost premature that the night after Columbine shootings some students posted
signs saying we forgive you Eric and Dylan.
I imagine that it took time for
Joseph to work things through with God. I'm sure that it took awhile before
Joseph saw God's hand in the circumstances that surrounded him. But Joseph kept
working on it. I don't know how long it took. And I don't know how long it will
take you. What happened to Joseph was certainly awful, but I know that many of
you have had awful things happen to you as well.
Initially I come up with lots of
rationalizations for not forgiving someone when they have offended me. But I
admit that after all his said and done I am reluctantly faced with a door that
I do not want to open. It is the door of truth of the Bible that teaches by
illustration and direct commands I need to be the one who initiates
forgiveness. I've looked for loopholes. I've longed to find a reason to not
forgive those who hurt me. But those reasons aren't there. In the Lord's Prayer
we pray, "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors."
In Mark 11:25 we read the words of
Jesus. "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone,
forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."
Jesus is not implying that
forgiveness of others is a prerequisite for salvation. But a true believer must
manifest the character of the Father. If we don't forgive we show that we have
not experienced (or don't appreciate) God's forgiveness. He told Peter and all
of us don’t just forgive someone 7 times, but 7 times 70.
In other words, the Bible tells us
that we have been forgiven a great debt. We have experienced what it means to
be set free so we should extend that grace to others. I know this is difficult
to hear but I believe it to be true: We do not forgive, because we do not
appreciate what we have been forgiven. We feel that what others have
done to us is worse than what we have done to God. Maybe it would be better
stated this way: We do not forgive because we have not grasped the serious
nature of our offense against God.
Forgive as the Lord forgave
you." (Col. 3:13) Our pattern for forgiveness is supposed to be Christ. It
is a required step if we are going to find peace of God within. The opposite of
forgiveness is bitterness and resentment. From a purely selfish standpoint, it
is foolish not to forgive. Why continue to live with bitterness? Why do that to
ourselves? Why not "let it go?" Even if the other person never
realizes the hurt they inflicted, WE are better off if we forgive. When we
refuse to forgive, we erect a barrier to joy. What someone did to us was
painful . . . but let's not compound that pain by playing the hurt over and
over in our minds.
Pastor Dale
Sermon Nuggets Weds Jan 2 Reconciliation
Gen 45:8-14
Reconciliation
It seems that when Joseph saw the
heart and the pain of his brothers. He wept and wailed and I believe a deep
desire for reconciliation. Reconciliation is the step to do what it takes to
make things right again. It is to bring two or more parties together in
agreement and remove the barriers that divide. The offense against another
party divides them. And sometimes retribution will take the barrier away.
Sometimes paying for the offense will take the barrier away, but the best way
is Gods way and it is forgiveness.
“But I say to you, love your
enemies, and pray for those who persecute you; in order that you may be sons of
your Father who is in heaven; (Mt 5:44).
Joseph revealed himself to his
brothers because they had evidenced real repentance, which made reconciliation
possible. Now that it was time to reveal himself. I read one preacher who believes
the reason Joseph sent the Egyptians away was in order to deal with the matter
of the sin of his brothers in strictest privacy. Not just to keep his emotions
from his slaves, because they all know anyway and it reached Pharaoh’s ears.
Now if you were to put yourself in
the shoes of the brothers, I am not so sure their reactions were unusual. Once
Joseph told them who they were they were terrified even more than just a ruler
of Egypt. It was bad enough to stand before a powerful Egyptian governor who
was angered at the theft of a cup, but to realize that he was their brother
whom they had sold into slavery—that was too much! Before, they at least had a
hope that this judge would be impartial and that mercy might motivate him to
accept their appeal. But now their judge must surely be their enemy, whom they
had unjustly condemned. No wonder they were petrified.
Now reconciliation is not easy. I
believe it is a faith step. One needs to ask God to help you. We are much
better at being angry than we are at being loving. Even when we want to do what
is right, we need God's help to do so. Ask God to help you to let go and to
"remember no more".
Not until Joseph had demonstrated that he had
forgiven them and loved them did they speak. Since they have come to recognize
the magnitude of their sin, Joseph need not belabor that point. The stress,
instead, falls upon the totality of the forgiveness he has given them or, as
the song writer has described it, “grace greater than all my sins.”
In general, we can say that
forgiveness is a conscious decision on the part of the offended party to
release the offender from the penalty and guilt of the offense committed. This
release not only frees the offender from guilt and punishment, but it also
frees the forgiver of anger and bitterness.
Pastor Dale
Sermon Nuggets Thurs Dec 3 Refocus
Gen 45
Refocus
To help in handling forgiveness change
your focus from the circumstances of the offense, to God’s sovereignty. Take
the step of turning it over to God who loves you than seeking to somehow punish
the offender in your own way. Faith is a step that acknowledges the sovereignty
of God. Nothing happens that God doesn't know about. There are no surprises with God. And the very details that brought
about the sale of Joseph into Slavery into Potipher's house are the exact
details used of God to bring about the salvation of the Israelites. Joseph was at the right place at the right
time under the direction of God for his greater purpose.
The refocused step realizes as one
person said. “Our disappointments are Gods’ appointments” The things that would
cause us to be discouraged are the things that God uses to bring bout good or
growth or understanding or dependency upon Him. “Consider it all joy,” James
tells us, “when you face trial of many sorts, for the trying of your faith
produces maturity. Making you complete and perfected by God.
Joseph’s words are filled with hope
and encouragement. “You sold me,” Joseph said, “but God sent me”. Their purpose
was to destroy, but God’s was to save. Men may sin by attempting to do what is
unacceptable to God, while at the same time they are accomplishing what God has
purposed. God brought good out of the situation.
Refocus on the power and plan of
God. Focus on God's Sovereignty rather than your pain. Salvation, not
destruction, was the purpose of God in what had happened. How, then, could
Joseph even consider doing to his brothers what they feared? Joseph would thus
be reminding them that his humiliation and suffering were the means to his
promotion and exaltation. Joseph is able to forgive because he sees his
situation from an eternal perspective. Paul says, "God is working for our
good in ALL things". (Rom 8:28)
Part of that refocusing is to
remember the attitude that was shown by Christ Himself. Jesus set aside His
rights and prerogatives in order to be rejected of men and hanged (innocently)
upon a cruel cross. Forgiveness is not
so difficult for the humble as it is for the haughty. If our sinless Savior was
willing to die on the cross for sinners, is it such a great thing for Him to
ask us to sacrifice our own interests for those of others?
Pastor Dale
Sermon Nuggets Fri Jan 4 - Restoration
Gen 45: 14 Then he threw his arms around his brother
Benjamin and wept, and Benjamin embraced him, weeping. 15 And he kissed all his
brothers and wept over them. Afterward his brothers talked with him.
16 When the news reached Pharaoh’s palace that Joseph’s
brothers had come, Pharaoh and all his officials were pleased. 17 Pharaoh said
to Joseph, “Tell your brothers, ‘Do this: Load your animals and return to the
land of Canaan, 18 and bring your father and your families back to me. I will
give you the best of the land of Egypt and you can enjoy the fat of the land.’
19 “You are also directed to tell them, ‘Do this: Take some
carts from Egypt for your children and your wives, and get your father and
come. 20 Never mind about your belongings, because the best of all Egypt will
be yours.’”
21 So the sons of Israel did this. Joseph gave them carts,
as Pharaoh had commanded, and he also gave them provisions for their journey.
22 To each of them he gave new clothing, but to Benjamin he gave three hundred
shekels of silver and five sets of clothes. 23 And this is what he sent to his
father: ten donkeys loaded with the best things of Egypt, and ten female
donkeys loaded with grain and bread and other provisions for his journey. 24
Then he sent his brothers away, and as they were leaving he said to them,
“Don’t quarrel on the way!”
25 So they went up out of Egypt and came to their father
Jacob in the land of Canaan. 26 They told him, “Joseph is still alive! In fact,
he is ruler of all Egypt.” Jacob was stunned; he did not believe them. 27 But
when they told him everything Joseph had said to them, and when he saw the
carts Joseph had sent to carry him back, the spirit of their father Jacob
revived. 28 And Israel said, “I’m convinced! My son Joseph is still alive. I
will go and see him before I die.”
Restoration
Joseph made plans to bring his
family to Egypt so they can all be together. Plans and provisions were given so
Jacob could know that Joseph is alive and he will also be given land and
resources under the Pharaoh’s order. Provisions for the journey would probably
have been grain, bread to eat, something to drink, and fodder for their
animals. Also, each of the brothers was given a change of clothing. Of course
when the silver cup was discovered in Benjamin’s sack all of the brothers tore
their garments as a sign of mourning. They probably needed something.
Restoration realizes that
forgiveness is not free. Sin must always have a price that is paid. But
forgiveness is the decision on the part of the offended to suffer the penalty
due the offender. If a banker pardons a loan, it means that the borrower does
not have to repay his debt, but it also means that the lender suffers the loss
of the money loaned and not repaid. If society pardons a criminal, it means
that society suffers the consequences of the criminal’s act, not the criminal.
If I go to your house and break a vase and you forgive me for my error, you
suffer the loss of the vase. If however I pay for the vase that is not
forgiveness it is redeeming myself by paying the consequences myself for my
sin.
True forgiveness is not earned. If
a man commits a crime and he serves out his prison sentence, he is not
forgiven; he has simply paid his debt to society. If a man cannot pay back a
loan within the time allotted but is forced to pay it out over some more
extended period of time, his debt has not been forgiven. If our forgiveness is
the kind that demands that the person “pay for it” before we will forgive, then
we are not giving forgiveness. That may be justice, but it is not mercy. It may
be law, but not grace. Just as we can in no way contribute to the forgiveness
and salvation which Christ has accomplished on the cross of Calvary, so no one
we forgive can be forgiven and yet forced to pay for their offense against us.
Perhaps the best analogy comes from
the dealing of God in the life of the disobedient saint. Since all the sins of
the Christian, past, present, and future, are forgiven at Calvary, God will not
punish the saint who is forgiven once for all. But there is still the need for
discipline and correction. The forgiveness of our sins assures us that God is
rightly related to us, but discipline causes us to draw more closely to him.
(Heb 12:5-11).
Joseph told them not to argue.
Although they were forgiven, they would face a great temptation to try to
assess the precise measure of guilt of each person. The buck would be passed,
and a heated argument would no doubt ensue. All of this was profitless since
all had been forgiven. Their trip would be a happier one if they focused upon
grace and not guilt.
When they returned home they told
the news to Jacob who couldn’t believe it. He had seen grace demonstrated in
their lives and say Joseph provided for the entire family during the famine. He
not only forgave but out of love gave abundantly as a picture of salvation and
the inheritance that is ours because of our Savior Jesus.
Some think to forgive means we have
to forget.
I realized forgiving someone does
not mean I may not trust them because I need to know are trustworthy. Do you
suppose Joseph could forget what had been done to him? Instead of forgetting,
he reminds them! "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for
good."
To forgive means things have to go
back to the way they were. . Forgiveness is simply making a new start. But some
scars are so deep that we feel we could never forget what happened. And we are
not sure we should forget.
Forgetting has more to do with
relationship than memory. God says “I, even I, am he who blots out your
transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more." (Isa.
43:25). But since God is all knowing it isn’t his inability to remember but a
figurative way to say they are as if we never sinned because the debt is paid.
It will not be brought up again. What God does is to make a choice to not allow
what has happened in the past to affect His relationship with us in the
present. We may not be able to literally forget what another has done but we
can refuse to let the past influence our relationship in the present.
Likewise, forgiveness does not mean
subjecting ourselves to the same hurt over and over again. Joseph had no
animosity for his brothers but he was not going to make himself vulnerable
again until he knew that they had changed. Joseph had no bitterness but he also
had no desire to be victimized again. In other words, forgiveness precedes a
restored relationship.
Suppose a person is being abused by
their spouse. The abuser says he is sorry. You believe him. You forgive them.
But you also tell the person that unless he gets some help you will not return
to the house. Is that incompatible with forgiveness? No, you can care about the
person; you can forgive them and still insist that something change. In fact,
if you care about the relationship you know that there will have to be change.
Forgetting becomes possible when both parties seek to establish a new
relationship that will keep this kind of thing from happening in the future.
Forgetting requires true repentance on the part of the offender and a resolve
not to wallow in self-pity in the offended.
A forgiven embezzler doesn't become a treasurer again. A
forgiven child molester should never be in a day care. It is idealistic to say that forgiveness
means things can go back to the way they were before; sometimes they
can/can’t. But forgiveness can still take
place!
Pastor Dale
